If only for a season...

Love bug-

I just found out that I got a new job. You see, I was laid off of work Feb 28, 2010. We kept you with Ms. Kelly as long as we could while I was looking for a new job. You see, she was the angel that was sent to Daddy and I when we were looking for someone to watch you. She was AMAZING, and became a very special part of our family. Leaving someone else to care for you was the hardest thing ever, and she was so great. After a month of looking for a job, we made the difficult decision to take you out of her care and I would be a stay-at-home mommy to you while looking for a job. Taking you out, meant that she would not have a spot for you when I found my next job.

Well, that time has come. Mommy found a new job-which means that I am needing to find someone else to care for you while I work. As I sit here and write this, I am literally in tears!! Being with you these past months, was such a special time. We did so much together!! Lots of little trips to the park, reading books, gardening, playing with new friends, jumping off the couch, throwing the ball for Thor, coloring, and just being together. Honestly, when the decision was made that I would care for you, I was crushed. I feel that you deserve so much, and that I would be taking away your friends and the way you learned from others. I felt that I would not be able to do a good job being you mommy! I was wrong, you loved being with me, and we really became so close.

I think about the next person that will be caring for you. I think about how crazy it is going to make me as a search and search until I find the person who is worthy to have you in their life, to teach you, to love you and to let you be a boy.

I spent some time putting away all of your 1st year items. WOW...time does fly and you do not skip a beat! You have grown into so much more than I could've even asked for in a son. You are rough, tough and have no fear. Although you eat so sloppy, throw everything and run and scream...you can still melt my heart when you sit quietly in my lap & want me to read you a book. Every so often, turning you head, puckering you lips, and leaning in for a kiss.

You are EVERYTHING to me, and I want you to know, that no matter where I am, what I am doing...I am doing it for you and I NEVER stop thinking of you!

You truly are mommy's little love bug!!!

We still have 5 weeks together before I start full time daycare, and they are going to fly by so fast! Auntie Des gave me the best advice, "enjoy this time with Brody, it may only be for a season".

I love you with all of my heart and you make me so proud to me called "mommy"!

Until next time....I LOVE YOU!!!!

Brody's first trip to the zoo

Drew and I decided to take a day and head to San Francisco and take Brody to the zoo for his very first time.

This would be our first time for Brody to we decided to bring along his bear backpack - a.k.a a baby harness and leash. Brody is still not used to it, nor is he fond of it. But...it makes us feel a little better and hopefully, with more practice, he'll get the hang of it.

In our mind, we had a totally different idea as to how Brody would react to the amazing animals that we would be so close to. I mean, giraffes, bears, anteaters, monkeys! A kids dream, right? WRONG! Drew and I were amazed at all these creatures, Brody however had his own favorite things at the zoo:

Plants (seriously...we have them in our backyard)
Birds (Which I think are a waste of time to look at)
Stairs (He found these next to the bear exhibit-yes BEARS and he would rather stairs)
Squirrel (not a flying one, just a regular old park one)
Statue (at least it was a statue of an animal...he gets 1/2 credit)

Although, for my active little boy, I think his favorite part was being outside and able to run around. There were 15 people in the whole zoo so with the place to ourselves...Brody could really explore. He walked...and walked....and walked!

The fresh air was so good for all 3 of us and it was a perfect family day. Below are some pictures from our trip:

Growing....so much...in just a year

I often look back, remembering back to being pregnant...being so anxious and wanting him to arrive early. I can still hear the voices of friends and family reminding me that I needed to cherish this time (blah blah blah). I remember the final 2 weeks...working around the house, cleaning, purging, getting my house ready for this little addition. Praying everyday...that he would come...I wanted him early...I wanted him NOW. I knew his little life was still being formed, that God was still laying out the path that he will be taking. That my grandma was holding him in heaven asking God for one more lullaby, one more kiss and one more story before sending him to me.

Well...I will admit it! EVERYONE was right...God sent me Brody, when Brody was ready. He had quite the schedule to keep...he was NOT allowed to come the weekend before his due date since it was a HUGE UFC fight night, and daddy really wanted to watch. He was not allowed to come until at least Feb 4th, since that's when Pappy arrived in town, and he was NOT allowed to come late...heaven forbid he would interrupt the Super Bowl. Being the compliant boy he is....he came at the earliest possible time, as to satisfy my yearning to meet him and not interrupt any other plans. Luckily for me...it was RIGHT ON HIS DUE DATE!!!

He was born at 5:42 pm on Feb. 4. He was 6 lbs and 21 1/2 inches long. Who was there to witness his birth...EVERYONE! Drew and I, of course, along with BOTH my parents and Drew's mom. Outside the doors were more friends and family. I was open (in more ways that one) to ANYONE who wanted to watch. The more the merrier!! Creepy...I know! Literally seconds after he was born, our room was flooded with people wanting to meet him. Uncle Scott, Uncle Ryan & Auntie Des, Erik, Brad and Gina. He was so loved...and still is by all of those people and more!

He popped out with his eyes WIDE open...ready to take on the world.

There were two things that I vividly remember to this very day:

#1 the feeling as I held him when I first saw him, thinking he was the cutest baby ever. Most newborns are not a pretty sight, but then you get those rare ones, who are perfect! I remember thinking that he was THAT ONE rare baby...that he was flawless. Well let me tell you....looking back at those pictures...he was a MESS!!! Cone head (seriously...like from the movie...full on conehead!), face all beat up...he really looked like he has gone through the ringer (which I guess he had).

#2 the food. Seriously to this very day...I still think (and tell people) that Kaiser Roseville serves the best meatloaf on the planet!!! That was my first meal after childbirth...and still thinking back today...so delicious!

I get tears in my eyes when I talk about that life changing day in my life. God had given this boy to me and placed him in my care and now it was my job to do the right thing in raising him.

Thursday, Feb 4th (2 days), Brody will be a year old and I have enjoyed every moment of this past year. He has grown so much and taught me more in the process.

Watching him take his first steps, saying a new word, his eyes lighting up when I come home from work, slide down a slide, throw a ball, play hide and seek, dance, throw his first tantrum (because he couldn't go on the escalator), playing with friends, making new friends, sharing a snack of goldfish crackers and grapes (with me and the dog), blowing kisses, splashing in the tub, reading books, throwing him on the bed, and sometimes...just sitting in our laps, quietly, enjoying the moment.

He is the little love of my life and he makes me want to be a better person...mother and wife! He has taught me unconditional love...a gift that I know I have received, but have never been able to truly understand.

My nurse asked me...(as my epidural had worn off and I was about to push) "Do you ever wonder why people do this more than once?" Although I do not remember my response (i bet it was very candid)...I do remember her handing me my son and saying "this is why"

Brody...everyday I have another reason to love you!

Happy Birthday my little love bug!

It was a white...."post-Christmas"!

This year Drew, Brody and I traveled with Pappy (my dad) to Denver. There we met up with Uncle Scott, Auntie Ashley, Uncle Ryan, Auntie Des and Cousin Eli!

Denver?...you ask. Well there was a youth convention happening and since most of the family was involved, we decided to make a reunion out of it. Downfall?...my mom couldn't be there. Other than that...it was a BLAST!

This was a Brody's first airplane ride and needless to say, I was nervous. There were many things that went into my fears, but the one I couldn't get out of my mind...changing a nasty poopy diaper in the box of a bathroom that they have on airplanes. You see...Brody is a regular kid and he poops every morning within 20 minutes of his bottle. "Save the bottle for take off" was everyone advice...uggh "that meant poop on the plane"! Well...that went off without a hitch...because obviously the altitude kept him "stopped up"! Phew....dodged that bullet!

All in all, Brody did AMAZING! He slept most of the way there and even played "peek-a-boo" with the people in the row behind us. They literally entertained him for 20 minutes with that.

On the flight home...same thing. Although the initial part had me a bit worried. We decided to let Brody walk all around before we boarded, in an attempt to tire him out for the flight. Well....for those of you who know Brody, he makes friends with everyone. As I followed him around the gate, he would stop to squeal at and "talk" to fellow passengers. He made quite a few friends and also gained quite a bit of attention. It was now time to board and we took our seat. Still trying to entertain him we would take turns lifting him up to touch the air vents and lights above us. This really made him laugh...thus attracting even more attention to himself. Up and down he went as he laughed and played. Hearing the giggles behind us, I knew he had an audience. Well it was almost time for take-off and it was Drew's turn to lift him up.
To preface this, Brody knows the excitement of "Ooooone...Twwwwwoooo...THREEEEEEEEE" and his face and squeals show this every time.

Picture with me Drew holding Brody...captive audience behind us, watching this little man giggle and laugh as his head pops into view.

One...Brody is lifted slightly in the air with a big smile!
Twwwwooooo...a little higher up as he squeals in delight!
THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....BONK!!!! Head into overhead compartment..."silent" scream approaching....and here it comes!

Well there are two sides to every coin.
Downside? Brody is no longer "happy".
Upside? Nobody saw him again because after 2 minutes of crying he was sound asleep for 3 hours!
See? Two sides!

Aside from the lack of sleep and crazy effects that the altitude had on us, it was a great trip. Spending time as a family was amazing. We ate, we laughed, we played Saved By the Bell trivia, read disgusting facts from a book and watched Brody and Eli play together!

It was so surreal to be at the convention. To see people that I went to the same conventions with when I was in High School. There we all were...with our little ones by our side. Talking about how funny it will be in many years when our little babies are grown up and going to these same conventions together. Amazing that as much as time flies by, there are always those people you will run into...causing you to think about the past...and be amazed at where God has brought you in the present.

Although we do not know when we will all be together like that again, I know that when we are...things will not change. We will pick up where we left off...eating, laughing and watching the little ones!

Enjoy a few of the pictures from our trip! (compliments of Auntie Ashley..the family paparazzi)

CLICK on the picture to see the whole thing!


Heading out in the cold…walking to lunch!


We’ve arrived..we’re hungry…the little ones are tired!


From the looks of Brody’s shirt…I think he enjoyed lunch!


Uncle Scott…telling Brody about the view! This is one of my favorite pictures. Scott has only seen Brody 3 times, but his love for him makes me so happy!


On the tram…as “typical” we only left the warmth for 3 things. #1: Food, #2 Starbucks, #3 Shopping! (This was for Pappy’s Bday…and all 3 of the other reasons)


Auntie Ashley and her two little Glo-Worms!


Yet another group photo taken of the kids. (As you can tell, Drew LOVES pictures)


Brody. I think that he is telling Pappy that we were making fun of him and putting him in Uncle Scott’s underwear.


He got over it quickly…he’s used to being the butt of the jokes!


The first…but not the last time...Eli is punching Brody! Ah cousins!


Uncle Scott: Okay Brody…you can do it just like this.
Brody: Ummm…that’s not how you do it….


THIS is how you do it!
Uncle Scott: Touché!